Even during times I forgot

Even during times I forgot

Seven years ago, I came to Illinois to work as an intern.

That was about the time I had to graduate from high school.

Seeing new people in an unfamiliar environment surely frightened me.

And every time I had to go through that situation, it was my mom who comforted me the most.

Whenever I was in pain or had hard times, my heart felt much lighter after talking to her on the phone.

As many days have passed, and as I got used to the place, I hardly ever called her.

I rather was frustrated when she called me while I was hanging out with my friends.

I had my cellphone number changed, but because I considered her calls inattentively, I postponed telling my mom my new number.

Then one day, I received a call.

“Hello? Who’s this?”

The person on the phone didn’t reply.

When I was about to hang up the phone, I heard a weeping sound.

“Who’s this? Who are you, and why are you crying on the phone?

“It’s your mom…”

“…………………………………….”

I couldn’t possibly call her “mom.”

“Sweetie, do you know my heart was in my mouth? I thought something awful happened to you.”

“M..om..”

With a sobbing voice, she said she was so anxious because she thought something happened to me.

She even called my former dorm prefect, and asked my friends back in my high school, but no one knew my new number.

Asking here and there, she finally got my number and got me on the phone.

I couldn’t say anything because I was so sorry.

Even when I lived without a blink or qualm, forgetting all about her, my mom continuously worried thinking that I might have had an accident or was hospitalized.

Worrying about me, she couldn’t eat or sleep.

And when she managed to fall asleep, she always had nightmares.

Hearing her on the phone, I realized how mean and an immature daughter I was.

I was also a mean and an immature daughter to Heavenly Mother.

Living in this world, I turned away from Heavenly Mother and forgot all about Her, and made her worry extremely.

But She always prayed for me and waited for me to return.

I truly feel so sorry to Heavenly Mother.

I want to stop being a troublemaker and become Heavenly Mother’s joyful daughter; who always listens to Her voice.